realdre - Domestic Violence Against Men, Is it Real? Part I

July 24th,2006 3:38PM EST


In our society there is much talk and funding about programs that support the stopping of domestic violence. However, these programs without question are geared towards for women and children. For the sake of conversation we will leave children out of it for the moment. Most, if not damn near all of these programs are for women. The entire notion of domestic violence is primarily focused of male violence against women. Just say the words [domestic violence] and instantly images of men in A-cut undershirts beating their wives and girlfriends is conjured. Men are victims of domestic violence as well. There is not a rational person that would disagree with that, however society at large as a whole believes this fairy tale notion that domestic violence against men is a joke.

Every time one reads the statistics of male-on-female violence versus female-on-male violence the numbers when viewed in comparison, are galaxies away. The main problem is male domestic violence goes far greatly unreported, undocumented, and utterly dismissed. Society at large has a hard time believing this especially. I mean men are supposed to be physically superior to women right? So there should be no male that is abused or assaulted by his female counterpart.

Yes, but If he was to strike her I have complete confidence in saying 9/10 times he will wind up in jail. Authorities tend to be more sympathetic to the female in that situation, especially if she looks a lot worse that he may look even though she may have initiated the physical and or emotional violence. But aside from lack of help from law enforcement, if a man stands up and says yes my female partner assaulted me or assaults me constantly…chuckling and sneers can often be heard. People just do not take it seriously enough, so much for equality.

Let’s bust some domestic violence myths shall we;

Myth 1
a) 90-95% of the domestic violence is by men against women.

Fact 1
a)The National Institute of Justice and the Center for Disease Control estimates that 1.5 million women and 835,000 men are the victims of domestic violence each year. Get the details

Myth 2
b) Every 10 or 12 seconds another woman is battered.

Fact 2
b) This factoid relies on inflated estimates of domestic violence. The National Institute of Justice and the Center for Disease Control estimates that 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are the victims of domestic violence each year. There are 31,536,000 seconds in a year. What does this mean? Every 21 seconds, somewhere in America a woman is battered. And every 38 seconds, somewhere in America a man is battered.

Myth 3
c)20-35% of women's emergency room visits are there because of domestic violence
d) battering is "the leading cause of injury to American women," or to women 15-44
e) domestic abuse causes more injuries to women than rape, auto accidents, and muggings combined

Fact 3
C,d,e)Only 1.85% of women's emergency room visits are due to domestic violence—all forms of violence account for only 5% of ER visits. 647,396 women visit emergency rooms (5%) for any assault. 923,336 (7%) go because of animal bites/stings, 2,386,488 (18%) for transportation accidents, 1,461,168 (11%) for overexertion.

Myth 4
f) Domestic violence by women against men is not serious.

Fact 4
According to the NIJ/CDC National Violence Against Women survey, 10.8% of the women but only 4.1% of the men used a knife on the victim. 21.6% of the male victims were threatened with a knife, while only 12.7% of the women were so threatened. 43.2% of the male victims were hit with a hard object capable of causing serious injury, while this was true of only 22.6% of the female victims. When all serious forms of domestic assault were added together, as many assaulted men as women were seriously assaulted.

Myth 5
g) All or almost all domestic violence by women is in self-defense.

Fact 5
A survey 0f 1,000 women, perhaps the largest survey of its kind, found that 20% had initiated violence. The most common reasons for women initiating domestic violence were: "My partner wasn't sensitive to my needs," (46%), "I wished to gain my partner's attention," (44%) and "My partner was not listening to me" (43%). "My partner was being verbally abusive to me" (38%) was a distant fourth.
Source: Fiebert. M. and Gonzalez, D. (1997). College Women Who Initiate Assaults on their Male Partners and the Reasons Offered for Such Behavior. Psychological Reports, 80, 583-590 (1997)


Myth 6
h) Domestic violence is a "hate crime" against women as women.
Domestic violence is socially-condoned oppression of women.

Fact 6
Domestic violence is not a "hate crime" against women or socially-condoned oppression of women
The myths are statements of ideology, not based on any scientific research. In fact, domestic violence is an issue of power and control in a relationship, and women can also be what Erin Pizzey, author of Prone to Violence, calls "family terrorists." In fact, domestic violence is committed by men and women with identifiable psychological pathologies, sometimes exacerbated by use of alcohol or drugs.

Domestic violence against women is not socially condoned. Men who do beat women typically feel shame and try to keep it a secret. Most men have little respect for a man who "beats his woman.

Source: Dutton, D. (1994). Patriarchy and Wife Assault: The ecological fallacy.
from Violence & Victims 1994, Click here to see full article
Article © 1994 by Donald G. Dutton.
See also, Erin Pizzey, "Working With Violent Women."

If violence against males is this bad how come men do not get the help they obviously deserve?

That is a damn good question. But there is no real scientific answer it is in the same clan with the answers abused women give.